5 Reasons People Aren’t Doing What You Want

Isn’t it frustrating when you ask people to do something, and they don’t do it?

Or they do take action, but they don’t do things the way you think they should?

This is a common frustration for leaders worldwide (even the less thoughtful ones), so in this post, I’m going to take a look at some reasons why you might be experiencing this problem.

When you’re dealing with people, things aren’t always as they seem.

Some of the causes of this issue might be because of you, and others are not really to do with you at all.

Let’s look at what they might be.

You can use these as a little diagnostic tool to see what might be happening in your particular situation.

Reminder: it’s not always all about you (but it sometimes might be)

Some people on Earth have a bit of “main character syndrome” going on.

That means they think everything revolves around them. They say things like:

“Why does this stuff always happen to me?” or

“How could they do this to me?”

In reality, it’s not all about us.

We need to remember that sometimes it’s about what’s going on for the other person.

Yes, we still need to consider how we may have contributed to the situation, but let’s not pretend we’re the cause of everything.

It’s about keeping our perspectives in balance.

Yes, you may have done something that caused the situation you’re in. And yes, the other person has things going on that are contributing too.

So keeping both of those views in mind, let’s look at the potential causes of people failing to do what you want them to.

For more on this, take a look at the iceberg post below. It’s a great model to remind you of this point.

Learn More:  Want to Build Empathy? Use the Iceberg Model.

Why people aren’t doing what you want

Reason 1. Lack of clarity

A common reason people don’t do what we expect of them is that they don’t really know what we expect.

This can happen for a few reasons.

First, we may have made an assumption that they know what we want.

Next, they may not have understood what we were asking for, or why it matters.

Or, we may not have explained ourselves well enough at all, and they might be hesitant to ask for clarification.

This is one of the reasons that sits firmly in your court as the thoughtful leader.

It’s up to you to explain clearly what you need, why it’s important and any specific details that are relevant to the situation.

Reason 2. Insufficient skills or knowledge

When people don’t do what you want, it might be because they don’t really understand how to do it.

This could be due to a lack of training, experience, qualifications or technical knowledge.

Well-meaning people might try to do what you want anyway, or do it the way they know how.

In this situation, some leaders jump to the conclusion that the person is disobedient, or incompetent.

Others will throw their hands up and ask: “Why don’t they tell me they can’t do it?”

Well – humans are status-driven beings.

And this means they may not want to lower their status by admitting they don’t know something in front of you or the rest of the team.

So if this is the problem, you’ll need to help them get comfortable admitting they don’t know what to do.

Reason 3. Lack of motivation and commitment

Some people are very obedient, and they’ll do whatever you say. This might be because they feel motivated to please you.

Others need to feel more motivated to do the work itself.

They want to be interested in the work they do, and to find meaning and purpose in it.

If they perceive the work to be unimportant or tedious, they might start doing other things that are more interesting.

I’ve experienced this in teams before. Instead of working on the highest priority task, people sometimes work on a side-project that is more interesting to them.

This is because there is a lack of alignment.

What they deem to be important is not the same as what you do.

Perhaps their career goals aren’t related to the work you have them doing. If that’s the case, it’s hard for them to force themselves to keep doing it.

To fix this dilemma, we either need to:

• Help them see how the work creates a positive impact, to the customer, the rest of the team, or the organisation itself; or
• Find tasks that are more interesting and aligned with their skillset and career direction.

Simply forcing someone to do work they aren’t motivated to do is usually a fruitless pursuit.

Instead, try to find alignment.

Learn More:  Make the Most of Motivation Models in Your Team.

Learn More:  Why You Should Prioritise That Career Conversation.

Reason 4. People aren’t doing what you want, because they think there’s a better way

It’s possible that people think there is a better way to do what you are asking them to do.

This is especially true now that we have so much information at our fingertips.

We can find out how to do almost anything, or improve how we’re doing it.

When I see this problem arise, it’s often because people don’t understand why something is done in the current way, or they feel they are being restricted in some way by following the current process.

This happens a lot with technology, where people need to use “locked down” corporate systems with far worse capability than other more user-friendly systems.

The result is often that people will “work around” the limitations, which may not be what you want them to do.

So your options are:

• Help them see why the current way is better or required (perhaps for safety or compliance reasons); or
• Take their suggestions on board and try them, rather than forcing them to try to hide what they’re doing.

If the current way really *is* the best way and they still don’t follow it… well, this is why consequences were invented.

So enforce them.

Learn More: Thoughtful Leader Podcast #295: Is your workplace a consequence-free environment?

Reason 5. They don’t trust you

Lack of trust in leadership is a big problem, and it can cause people to ignore your directions.

There are a few aspects to look at when it comes to lack of trust.

First, it could be that they think you lack credibility. That is, they don’t think you have the necessary skills, qualifications or experience to give them direction.

Or it might be that they don’t feel as if you’re listening to them, or care about them.

Instead, they may feel as if you’re more focused on yourself than what they need.

Being unreliable is another common source for a lack of trust.

Building trust takes time, but without it, even if you do have the best ideas, people will be reluctant to follow.

For more on building trust, take a look at this article: Start Being Trustworthy For Your Team: Here’s How.

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If you’re experiencing this issue, does anything stand out to you from the list above? If not, what do you think the cause is for your situation?

Let me and all the other thoughtful leaders know by leaving a comment below!